You ever feel like......

I started framing my drawings over the weekend and for the first time, I looked back and said holy shit...I've drawn a lot. If I had kept any of my old blog entries you would have seen how tortured a maker I was. I was angry for awhile because I wasn't where I thought I should be, I was frustrated because I didn't know my voice or feel secure in my artistic identity.  Since I started specifically zentangling, I found peace with ink and paper, with lines and shadows, with perspective and depth, colors and shading...we are friends now and I am like FUCK YEAH! I missed you. I really did. I missed just the feeling of my hands gliding across the paper drawing lines, filling them in, not giving two shits if it is correct or not, just getting it out and loving it with mistakes and with every organic formation that it makes.

I think deciding that I didn't want to be on the rat wheel to be a "known" artist helped me become a better one. It's like you get on this wheel and start chasing this title, a title that you already are but it's not the same, you're really chasing the glitter and notoriety...the quasi fame almost of being known, being sort out and "wanted". For me, it was a loooong lesson in learning that hey...that's just not who I am as an artist. I just want to make and put it out there, sold or not, known in real life or just a virtual figment that occasionally crosses one's mind, I just want to make. Since I have just jumped off the wheel...my creative spirit really has been soaring.

This is the benefit to zentangling....the "Zen"....you learn all these lessons from just organically drawing and accepting what forms on the paper.

I'm having a great reflective morning today...really great.

Here's a picture of a majority of the drawings framed.